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The Big Bang Theory

There are few television sitcoms that can make me laugh. But of those that warrant the volume being turned up, perhaps my favourite is The Big Bang Theory.

The star of the show is Sheldon—a highly intelligent theoretical physicist, whose distaste for social conventions is an endless supply of comedic fodder. In one episode, Sheldon receives an unexpected Christmas gift from his neighbour Penny.

Sheldon: ‘You bought me a present? Why would you do such a thing? I know you think you’re being generous but the foundation of gift-giving is reciprocity. You haven’t given me a gift—you’ve given me an obligation!’

If you laughed at this line then perhaps you have experienced the feeling of obligation that can come along with gift-giving. Statements like these may sound familiar to you: ‘I have to go shopping for Christmas presents’ and ‘I have to buy a gift for [such and such]’.

Cast your memory back to when you were a child buying a gift for someone, perhaps mum or dad. Do you recall such thoughts and feelings of obligation? Or, like myself, do you recall the excitement of looking for and finding just the right gift, the fun of choosing the paper and wrapping it, the agony of keeping it a secret until D-Day, and the anticipation of watching mum or dad open it up?

Nowadays, things are a little different. Short on time and temper, we’re less excited by finding a gift than by finding a parking space on the first lap. There’s no agony of waiting for D-Day anymore because we’re so busy that life speeds past us quicker than a P-plater on the motorway. And the entire exercise of wrapping is often reduced to one fold and one lick, because sneaking its way inside more and more Christmas cards is the gift voucher—the gift that says, ‘I care enough to go to the store, but not enough to pick something out’.

What has happened here? How did we morph from Kris Kringle into the Grinch?

It seems that, as we grew older, we began to think more about our own experience than the experience of the person for whom we were buying the gift. Gradually, our selflessness became selfishness—the result of which is one unhappy shopper and a gift lacking in thought and originality.

The good news is that we can experience the childlike joy of gift-giving again. To do so, we need only return the focus of our attention to where it belongs: the receiver of our gift. If we approach the task of gift-giving with genuine selflessness, we feel that same sense of excitement and enthusiasm we did as children. The feelings of obligation dissolve, and the result is an enriched experience for the giver and a thoughtful gift for the receiver.

At the end of the Big Bang episode, Sheldon opens his present from Penny to find a used napkin from the restaurant where Penny works. Scribbled on the napkin is an autograph from Sheldon’s all-time idol, Leonard Nimoy. Sheldon’s reaction to this poignant gift is to offer Penny a hug—an act he does not perform regularly nor lightly.

At this time of year, when the pressure of gift-giving is at its peak, remember that a gift born of obligation benefits neither the giver nor the receiver—but a gift born of selflessness benefits both.

Article written by Australian Bookkeepers Network (ABN)

To find out more about ABN visit www.austbook.net